![]() I told them that Tom was not a coward, he was in pain. How could he do this? How could he leave his son? What made him so unhappy? These questions were causing such agony. His parents were devastated and deeply confused over the loss-not just for themselves, but for their grandson as well. Tom was a depressed young man who had a problem with alcohol and drugs. I was helping a family that lost an adult son to suicide. With this realization comes more blame and guilt. These things could have taken place without you noticing. They might have left a note to explain, but more likely than not, your questions are left unanswered.Īfter the fact, you may realize that they were getting things in order. They completed their paperwork, caught up on bills, gave away meaningful possessions. Once a person has made the decision to complete suicide, it can be like a burden has been lifted from their shoulders. Your loved one might have been in the best place emotionally and mentally that you had seen in a very long time. What did I miss? How could I have prevented it? Blame and guilt seem to overwhelm the survivors left behind. Was my husband, wife, son, daughter…depressed? Sick? Having problems at work? What was going on that I didn’t see? The hardest part of dealing with suicide is the blame we place upon ourselves. ![]() It is a private matter to lock in the family vault. At times, the family is in such denial that suicide could happen to them that the scar will be covered up for as long as possible. Yet, it is still whispered about, not brought out in the open and discussed like it should be. There is no shame, embarrassment or cowardice behind this act. ![]() In my experience, most people don’t want to talk about it, let alone admit that a family member or loved one died by suicide. You can also get crisis text support via the Crisis Text Line by texting NAMI to 741741. If you or someone you know is experiencing a mental health, suicide or substance use crisis or emotional distress, reach out 24/7 to the 988 Suicide and Crisis Lifeline (formerly known as the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline) by dialing or texting 988 or using chat services at to connect to a trained crisis counselor.
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